Far Far by Yael Naim

How can you stay outside...

There's a beautiful mess inside

Margarita y Azucena

Sigh, I sometimes wonderfully amazes me. Another stupid mistake of mine.

I found that my ex (Mr. M) had ditched me on facebook yesterday morning. GREAT! So he's already found someone new! Little stars twinkling around my head like those you see in Japanese cartoons. I was again back to the state of "hoshin" (jp: characters meaning throwing away the heart) and my sister had to constantly remind me to breathe by saying "hey! breathe! breathe!" like every 10 mins that morning. I decided not to do any schoolwork that day because there was no hope for me focusing on anything like preparing for the US History exam.

I sent 3 messages, 2 voice mails, and maybe like...10 missed calls on his cell. Goddamn time difference! Too bad, yesterday was Friday night in the US and Fridays are party nights for college kids. Mr. M happens to fall into the category of "party animals" (this is no praise, guys), so no chance for he picking up the phone.

Another hundreds of Kleenex consumed.

Anyway, finally I got him on the phone this morning, and it turned out that it was ME. I BLOCKED HIM on facebook. When!? Don't remember at all.

Enough for the stupid story.

Mariana Baraj is the goddess on earth.
Argentine music always gives me chills.

The Iliad

We must prepare to answer for the results of our own actions and realize that when we act wrongly we will cause suffering both for ourselves and, perhaps more important, for those we love.

Truely Civilized Human Thoughts

Keeping diary never lasts more than 3 days for me. It's just glaringly outside of my ability. Well, I guess the same thing can be said for this blog.

My new life in Tokyo consists of; working on tons of tedious homework (the liberal arts college system is a real killer), watching Japanese TV shows, checking facebook every 5 minutes, cooking and cleaning and shopping and...more but not worth listing.

There used to be one more thing on the list until very very recently.

***Ta-dahhhh!***

CRYING and NOT BREATHING!

Life clearly showed me how stupid I was (and still am) and how badly things can get out of hand sometimes. I learned what real "regret" means in kind of a harsh way. Nah, that's the way life goes, and it is the only way to actually learn something important in life. It took a long time and hundreds of Kleenex to "understand" it fully though.

This guy who is taking the same classes with me is a bit strange in an interesting way. He's a person who doesn't know where to keep a mouth shut. Very different from me. It's like the difference between art in the Ancient Egypt and the Bronze Age Greece. A bit of geeky talk, I had a humanities exam yesterday and had to compare and contrast art in the two civilizations. F-a-s-c-i-n-a-t-i-n-g!

Anyway, we talk about literature and philosophy kind of things. Yesterday was the first time we had a chat online, and he told me something like, "you are always serious, and you are waisting something in you because of it."

Hmmm, interesting...I think he's right, but I don't know exactly where the statement can be applied yet. And now I'm getting hungry, so I'm gonna grab something to satisfy this hunger temporarily.

Hit the Lights

Going to Aomori tomorrow.

Family Trip for 4 days:)

I Need Some Sleep

I need some sleep
You can't go on like this
I tried countin' sheep
But there's one I always miss
Everyone says, I'm gettin' down too low
Everyone says, you've just got to let it go



I need some sleep
Time to put the old horse down
I'm in too deep

And the wheels keep spinnin' round
Everyone says, I'm getting down too low
Everyone says, you've just got to let it go



You've just got to let it go
You've just got to let it go
You've just got to let it go

I Need Some Sleep/Eels


Yeah, I know I've just got to let it go.
But somehow I'm not breathing proprely,
and it makes my hands tighten and hold onto the past.
I'm moving forward soon though.
At least I promise I will.